Skating through Grief: An Olympian’s Choice

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BY: Diane Snyder Cowan

CATEGORY: Grief and Loss

Joannie Rochette, bronze medalist in the 2010 Winter Olympics for Canada skated through her grief. Two days before the short program, Rochette’s mother died suddenly of a heart attack, just hours after arriving in Vancouver to watch her daughter skate. Rochette chose to continue competing in her mother’s honor. In the Olympic short program, Rochette recorded a personal best, the third highest score of the night. Two days later, she held on to her third place position after the long program and won the bronze medal.

Is this normal? Did she do the right thing? How is one able to put aside feelings of grief and go on with the show? This is not the typical or expected grief reaction. It did show enormous inner strength. Rochette was able to compartmentalize her grief and perform. Rochette is an incredibly disciplined athlete and she was able to concentrate and remain focused. She performed well and then chose to skate again in the gala to honor her mother.

Do not expect yourself to grieve in this fashion. Rochette set the bar high. Grief is hard work. Everyday, the bereaved return to jobs or school and put aside their grief. Grief is put on hold or put into a container, if you will. Putting aside the heartache in its own “space” can enable you to direct your focus and deal with the work in front of you. At the end of the day, you’ll find grief as your companion, which you may or may not welcome.

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